The beauty of doing nothing

Letting go of the need to be doing something constantly

After publishing my first post a week ago, I’ve been wanting to finish the second one today. But as I was starting to work on the next one, I noticed that my mind and body weren’t in the right space. With my original blog idea, I had planned to not set any particular times to post. However, since the original idea transformed, I've thought why not actually post every week and set a day of the week to post because after all, that way I can hold myself accountable and actually have a motivation to write every week.

At the time, so last week, I felt quite in the flow of writing. It felt easy and I wrote a lot. But for a week now, I've struggled to function. We're in the middle of Kiwi Summer and it's hot. This summer seems to be nothing like the previous one that was defined by lots of rain, floodings and cyclones. Though it's been nice to have such a sunny summer after last year’s rainy summer, I've struggled a lot, too. My brain has been feeling fried most of the time and I couldn't get myself to do much. The only time I've functioned really was in the morning before midday sun hit.

Summer, the time of the year with the highest productivity right?
That's what I thought was summer’s defining character and why it was always my favourite season. Now, I don't think I have favourite seasons anymore.

This summer, I'm being reminded of how extremes/opposites can co-exist. Summer can be a time of productivity, a time when lots of things are happening. Yet at the same time it can also be a time of not being productive.

And that's okay. Though a part of me sees not being productive as not okay. But why is that?

No space for breaks

Our whole society is based on productivity. Everything needs to be productive. Not being productive is not accepted.

Work. Work. Work. Do. Do. Do.

We need to do things constantly.
Sitting still and pausing is unthinkable.

In our society, doing things that have no tangible result are seen as a waste of time whereas doing things that have tangible results are desirable.
We've reached a point where a lot of people can't even sit still anymore, can't do nothing but always have to be doing something. Sitting still, doing nothing and silence are uncomfortable because that means sitting with ourselves and our thoughts.

Our minds are constantly racing. We're hustling our way through life but there will come a day when we don't have much time left and only then we'll realise how much time we have wasted thinking that doing nothing is wasted time, while it in fact it's not.
The only time wasted is the time we've been hustling through life never being able to stop and simply be and enjoy the moment. If we don't ever stop, everything will pass by in an instant.

But is that really what you want? Feeling that life was short and that you've never had enough time to enjoy the simple pleasures of life?

Well, it's definitely not what I want. And though I struggle with pausing as well, because hustling is so deeply engrained, I try to include breaks or embrace them while they naturally occur like today when I noticed caterpillars on one of my parsley plants and watched them munching through it.

Authenticity over stress

As already mentioned, in the past week I've been barely functioning. When I got back after work and even on my days off all I could do was watch Netflix or YouTube even though I would have liked to do "productive" things or just things I enjoy like writing, gardening or crafting.

I could have worked on this blog, which I have been so excited about, I could have done the tax return from my self-employed income that is already overdue or I could have edited photos from travelling during the holidays, but no, all my body wanted was lying down and not thinking.

And I felt incredibly unsatisfied because I really wanted to things but physically didn't feel able to.

Today after noticing that I wasn’t in the right space for working on my second post, I decided to let go of the idea of posting every week. I know it's a great goal and I'd love to do it yet at the same time it does feel like a lot of pressure particularly during times that I'm not functioning well.

And I know consistency and frequency is very important for success on social media and the digital space but honestly I'm not trying to be successful with this blog.
Not to say I don't want to be successful, it would be amazing but it's not my main goal of the blog. What I care more about is sharing my writing and being authentic.
After all this blog is about living a slower, simpler and more serene life. Sticking to rigid schedules and stressing over posting is very much the opposite of what I'm trying to achieve.

Instead of working on a blog post, I've been reading and I made bubble tea myself for the first time, which has been something I’ve been wanting to try out.

The beauty of doing nothing

At some point in the afternoon while sitting at the door to our garden, I lighted a Citronella Candle to prevent mosquitos coming in. While doing so, I got lost in gazing at the flames. I don't know how long I watched them but it was so calming just to sit and watch.

It once again reminded me of the beauty of doing nothing, something I don't do too often.

I struggle to get myself to sit still and just be. But every time I do it, it's so peaceful and I'm grateful I've done it.
And it's a reminder that I need more of doing nothing in my life.

One of my greatest teacher at the moment is our 1 year old cat, Pehu. She has her zoomy phases during the day in which she is absolutely crazy, adventuring in the gardens, playing with the neighbour’s cat, chasing after lizards, insects and birds, which she unfortunately catches and brings into the house quite frequently, but she is also an absolute Zen Master.

Being around her is so grounding. I love when she's in her Zen mood, having her eyes closed, sitting in the same pose, not moving at all and is simply being in the present moment.
Every time I observe her during her Zen moments, my mind calms down and thoughts disappear. Her Zen is contagious.

Though a part of us wants to be doing everything, we might actually need to do more of nothing, just like cats. The world would be a better place, I think, if more people would do nothing more often and let go of this need to always be achieving something.

So from now on I’ll try to embrace more moments of nothingness.

Be.Be.Be. instead of always Do. Do. Do.

How about you, do you also feel like doing more nothing sometimes?

P.S. As you can see, after letting go of the plan to finish my second post today, I did end up finishing it. It just turned into something else.